~ Abraham Hicks ~
Patterns That Don't Allow the Fullness of Who You Are
Throughout our lives we pick up patterns of behavior, from our parents, extended family, friends, at school, at work, from different experiences and often we outgrow them, if they were even for our benefit in the first place. They become a habit and we continue repeating the patterns, even although they no longer feel good.
Abraham gives another example of how important it is for us to trust our inner being, and therefore ourselves.
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Play the video on the left 'Abraham Hicks - Patterns That Don't Allow the Fullness of Who You Are - to hear the full audio on this subject.
Listening time: 15 minutes
I've been trying to notice my emotions that are there for caring, that are there for me. My emotions are not a reaction from anyone else or anyone's actions, no matter what. No matter what circumstances that I'm in.
Well, when you get there you're free.
Well, that's what I'm...
Then you can be in the world, what everyone wants freedom from is the bondage of not feeling good. The bondage of negative emotion. What you want freedom from is resistance, and when there's no resistance then you're floating free toward the things that you care about, and then you're of value to others as well.
Right, so I'm, I just wanted to hear you say that about the subconscious isn't as strong, or a powerful thing, as it's made out to be.
If it begins to gain-
You'll feel it, and when you feel it then you can do something about it, but getting control of your vibration means having awareness of your emotions. One of the things that sometimes happens, and this is worth talking about, is that sometimes things that don't feel good feel so normal you keep doing them anyway. Doesn't feel good but it feels familiar, so you keep doing it because it's familiar not because it feels good. So somewhere along in this scenario we want to convince you that it's good for you to feel good, and that feeling good is good. It's strange that we would have to have a seminar that if it feels good, it's good, or that feeling good is good, because there's been a lot of people who have needed to control you for their benefit by getting you to do things that don't feel good to you, that's not the guidance you want to follow.
I think the miscommunication for me is like when the gentleman was talkingabout how it was his desire to his father be proud of him.
And how it does feel good, you know, when someone is proud of you, is to maintain that level of, you know, I just want that relationship with my inner being, and I'm proud of me when my inner being is proud of me. Why does it feel so bad when, you know, I mean why do we feel the need to care so much? How can I-
Why is it uncomfortable when someone presses a pillow to your face and it doesn't let you get any air? It's the same question. Saying why does it feel bad when I block myself off from the life-giving energy of source.
I guess that's it's not, it is
Why does it feel bad?
Why does it feel comfortable, I guess does the word...
Give a broader statement. Why does it feel comfortable?
Why does it feel, um when you say we do those things that we know we don't want to, but they seem to kind of happen out of habit, because they're more comfortable. I don't know...
Well, we know what you're getting at because things that feel familiar, you continue to do them. So, let's say that you've been trained, like most have in this environment, to pleasing others because the others who want to be pleased are the ones training you, so it's logical that they would be looking out for their own best interests, and we're not pushing against that in any way so let's say that you've been trained to please and you've gotten pretty good at it. Well there isn't anything wrong with wanting to uplift, and a lot of what others want, you want too, and you want on behalf of others too. So it becomes a little complicated in terms of where all the desires are coming from.
So, now put your inner being in the picture who knows who you really are, what you came intending to do, what life has caused you to ask for, and most important, what the path of least resistance is right now to lead you toward what you want, and your inner being is offering, vibrationally, a very clear perspective, you might say opinion.
Now, if you get cross ways of that opinion of your inner being, and you stay cross ways of it, or in defiance of it very long, you won't feel good. It's like bucking the current of your own well-being. Doesn't feel good and isn't good for you, and let's make that statement even more specific. Bucking the current of your own evolution, of your own expansion, of your own choices, of your own decision-making processes, of your own learning, of your own growing, of your own becoming, isn't good either.
So, your inner being would inspire you to take chances that your mother would never allow you to take, because your inner being knows that expansion and understanding is a really big part of who you are, and what you want while your mother is really protective in nature about you, you see. So, then as you mind your mother, rather than minding your inner being, if you get too carried away in that you can begin to develop patterns that just don't allow the fullness of who you are to flow.
Now an important distinction - your inner being will never get mad at you, and never pull away from you, or never punish you, or never try to get you to move in one direction by making another direction worse. Your inner being doesn't play those games, but humans often do and so once you begin to accept that your inner being really is on your side, and that that does not make your inner being against anyone else, that's a really big distinction.
Your inner being is on your side, but your inner being is not against the others that you've decided to make your adversary.
Your inner being is always on your side, which means on the side of your thriving. On the side of your understanding. So sometimes, because you really want to understand something, your inner being might inspire you into a behavior, or a conversation, that will help you define with more clarity who you really are, and what you really want and that doesn't mean you've left the path.
You were born into this time and space knowing that there's a step one to the equation of creation.
Step one - ask, and you can't ask if you don't have some way of standing in some place where you can focus. If you don't know what you don't want you can't begin to identify what you do want.
So you came, not just willingly but eagerly, into an environment where you knew that there would be choices that you would not want to make, but how you gonna know what choices that you do want to make? The most important significant understanding from your inner being is your inner being always chooses love over anything that isn't.
So if you are looking at someone, or some experience, or some situation where instead of feeling love you feel anger, or resentment, then while you have certainly the free will to do it and how can you know what you want unless you do something what you don't want. Your inner being does not go there with you.
So the strongest proof that you could ever have about the love that is your inner being, is how bad you feel when you move away from it. If that didn't exist and that wasn't who you are, then when you deny it or defy it, you'd just feel normal, but you don't, you feel bad.
We're almost on something. You're right at something important. Can you feel it about to pop?
I don't know. I guess I'm taking in everything that you're saying and I hear and resonate completely with what you're saying. I guess I just, when I found your teachings became aware that I had a choice. I just, like you said, you do what your mom wants and things like that, so to me just having a choice was eye-opening enough, you know, but then...
And then having the discipline of focus to utilize the choice, because thoughts are rampant around you, and lazy thought will take you into places you don't want to go.
So how do you sharpen up your focus so that you aren't so lazy or lackadaisical in your thought?
By caring about how you feel.
By catching it in those early stages.
And I guess the only other thing I really have a question about, you know before here, is about Source. Like I know we're extensions of Source. I believe that Source is, I don't know if I'm asking, is source something other than our inner being and if so does source want worshipped by anyone?
No, not any of that. Your inner being, because of law of attraction, is gathered together with many, many others, and that culmination of all of that, everyone who has ever been physically focused, and we're not saying that you have to be physically focused ever to be source, but we're saying everyone who has ever been physically focused who has reemerged back in a non-physical is part of that source, and as they reemerge they leave behind any resistance that they've picked up along their physical trail. So it's just as pure love and knowing and well-being.
In the same way that our friend, we enjoyed the conversation so much, who wanted the approval of his father, source does not need, or want your approval. Source just loves, and therefore approves. The thing that is most uncomfortable for most people, when they are uncomfortable, this is the reason, they are looking at themselves, or at someone else, and having a knee-jerk reaction to what they're seeing, and not knowing that, they have control over what they see, because they think that it's a done deal, and that now they are just seeing it, and what it is is what is, and they have no control over what they're seeing and therefore they have no control over what is, and therefore they feel vulnerable, and therefore they feel defensive, and therefore they don't allow the love that is really them to flow.
Did that sort of add up for you? When someone is having a hard time in their life experience, and they want to love themselves more, but are having a hard time doing it, we like to say to them - it's harder for you to love you than it is for you to love almost anybody else, because you've practiced not loving you more than everybody else, and the reason that you've practiced not loving you is because you've been expecting others to love you who weren't assigned to love you.
You're running around the world trying to get somebody to love you, and when they don't, then you take it really personal, and then you start looking for flaws in yourself and you develop these patterns of feeling deficient, or flawed, which your inner being feels just the opposite about you, and so the more you do that, the worse you feel. The more you do that, the worse you feel, the worse you feel the more you do that, is sort of that sort of cycle, so that's one of the reasons that you enjoy hooking up with what we know about you, because as you listen to us long enough, you begin to feel the resonance of it, then you're in a position where you can begin to make some conscious choices.
The choice really has to start with how you want to feel.
So then we say to that person who wants to love themselves - you know it'd be a whole lot easier if you would just love. Just look for positive aspects out there. Don't try to find them in yourself, they're harder to find in yourself because you've got beliefs that are kind of in the way of that, so yourself is not usually your path of least resistance to find a loving feeling about yourself, because you know everything about you. You know you didn't make your bed, you know you didn't study for that test, you know you were mean to that person when you didn't mean to be, you knew you were mean to that person when you did mean to be, in other words you know everything about yourself, and you've picked up all these rules and requirements from everywhere, and none of them even go together.
They're all in conflict with each other, but you still take them all personally and try to do them all. You try to stand on your head in so many different ways to be approved of, when that appreciation and love and if you want to call it approval has been there for you every moment of every day, you just have to look in that direction, and you can't look in that direction and in that direction at the same time.
For example, recently Esther was at an airport in another city, waiting for her bag on the carousel, and she was starting to recognize bags going around which meant they probably were not putting any more bags on the carousel, or that was her flawed conclusion. So she isn't liking the feeling of that because the things in her bag, she brings with them because she wants them and needs them, and then her thought went to what would happen, and then she realized because she hasn't deviated very far, and she had a conscious thought - I feel worried, and then she thought - I can't be worried and satisfied at the same time, which am I gonna choose, because I'm standing here, what is is, but I have a choice.
The bag being there, not being there, does not need to control whether I'm satisfied or worried. It starts right there. Well as it turned out she was playful with herself. She felt worried, but she didn't want to feel worried, but her bag still wasn't there so because she chose to feel satisfaction she is still in the receiving mode, and she remembered a childhood game. It's silly. Maybe you played it? She remembers everyone's in a circle, little kids at a birthday party, and the game is - and the doggy won't bite you, and it won't bite you, and you have a handkerchief and the doggy won't bite you, and he won't bite you, and he won't bite you, but he will bite you and then you drop the hanky and then you run, and that person has to get the hanky and catch you before you get around the circle. Really a fun game if four or five.
So, Esther is playing that at the carousel, the doggie won't bite you, and the doggie won't bite you, and the doggie won't bite you, and the doggie won't bite you, and then her bag was right there she's - but it will bite you and she grabbed her bag off.
Now we're not saying that she made the bag come, the bag was coming. We're just saying that she was feeling worried when she could feel satisfied, and she wanted to feel satisfied and that's always the best choice, and even if the bag had not come she could be satisfied, because she can figure things out, and because things are always working out for her, and sometimes something not working exactly the way you think you want it to opens doors so that there are more opportunities to have more fun, with more people, and you actually have a more fulfilling more satisfying experience than if everything had gone just the way you wanted it to go, but you got to stay in the receiving mode.
So at the first sign of dissatisfaction, don't let yourself go there, and what you'll begin to notice is that, oh it's a cooperative universe, in the leverage, the attraction power that your inner being has instigated and continued to promote on your behalf is unfathomable to most humans minds.
You just can't even contemplate the bigness of the love and appreciation and knowledge that your inner being holds about your well-being.
So, as you begin to let yourself hang around in that vibration more, then you have way more fun first of all, and you gain more confidence, and in that confidence comes bigger dreams and bigger creations, and more opportunities for more fun and by bigger we don't mean, as we valued by humans, we mean more in terms of what means more to you, you're not ever not expanding.
Your inner being is always expanding and really a lot because of you, so choosing to be satisfied is like choosing to go in the direction of your expansion.