~ Abraham Hicks ~
What to do When Surrounded by Negative People
I'm not sure about you, but as I've been listening to Abraham and working on keeping my vibration high, I've come across negative people who have knocked me out of my vibration.
I'm so glad I found this recording! Abraham explains what is happening to your vibration when surrounded by negative people, whether it's strangers, friends or family, and what you should do instead of letting it affect you.
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Listening time: 12 minutes
I've become sort of the Abraham in my family, and they're not liking it very much. Sometimes they do, and other times I feel like they just want to hang up the phone, so I don't know how to deal with it because, do I back away from my family and my friends, or do I continue to push when you know I'm talking with them and they start pouring all their negative... negativity and complaining, and it's all they really do when we talk on the phone. So, I've gone from listening, I've gotten better at listening when... I'm confused if I should hang up the phone and ignore them or...
Well we would ask ourselves because you're an uplifter and a teacher to the core of your being, and your frustration is because you are finding some viable tools that are helping you, and you would like to offer them to others, and sometimes it feels like they're not trying, or it could be better for them if they would allow it to be better for them, but the question that you could ask as you're having that contrasting experience is, because it is your experience, it feels like it's about them, but you're having the experience and you can't do anything about their experience, but you can do plenty about your experience.
So, if you ask yourself the question and it's harder to do while it's happening, but the question is - in what way is this contrast serving me? And since you are a teacher to the very core of your being, sooner or later you're going to come to the awareness that if people know what they're doing, they're not looking to you for guidance, and if they are looking to you for guidance, it's logical that they need guidance.
If you were watching a little child learning to walk, and every time it tries to stand up, it falls over. You wouldn't say - get up you little dummy. You would want to give this child an opportunity to find its balance, and you would also understand that while this child has the benefit of watching other people walking around, that this child has to find its own balance, and it's true of everyone that you're trying to help too. So, the best that any of us have to offer is the clarity of our own example, and what's really bothering you about it is, if their negativity becomes the dominant vibration in a moment so that their grid is the one that is getting filled in with your irritation, that's what's upsetting you.
In other words, whose grid is the dominant grid. If you are connected to source and you're really lined up with your grid, and they're not ready for you, the phone call won't happen, and what's happening is you're meeting them on their terms. You're meeting them on their turf, on their grid. You're meeting them where they are, and then wondering why you can't bring them to a higher vibration. They have to meet you on your turf, on your grid, and a lot of times they're not ready.
So, without even realizing it you go looking for them. You go looking for trouble. You meet them on their terms, their grid's dominant, you feel bad then it feels like they're the reason that you feel bad, and they're not even trying, and then, isn't it interesting? So, is there an advantage when something like that happens, and you're thinking about it after the fact. What went into your Vortex? What are the positive aspects? What was born out of that? Just in your mind, think of the last conversation that didn't go well and the discord that you felt about it, because you were justified in it, in other words you're not making this stuff up, you felt it it was real, but what did you put in the vortex as a result of it?
To not contribute as much in the next conversation in the same way.
But instead of thinking about what will I do differently, we're asking you for a grid answer, and the grid is a really general vibration, core general vibration.
So, Esther found the core vibration of fun and just focused on it, now she's working on the core vibration of harmony. When something happens, discord with someone, she is aware that what she really wants is harmony. What she really wants is understanding. What she really wants is collaborative, cooperative components in her life experience, and she's willing to accept that there are many, many people who are not in in this particular moment in time cooperative components to her, and she's realizing that she is holding uncooperative components in her experience by her attention of them, so she's asking herself - what is it that I want? Because she knows we are convincing her that if she will focus upon what that experience has caused her to want, that that experience cannot return unless she's active about that experience. Does that make sense to you?
If someone behaves by your perspective inappropriately, and you give your attention to the inappropriateness of their behavior, you establish a grid and practice a grid that keeps causing you to rendezvous with that person on that level until you are convinced that it can be no other way, because that's just how it always is with them, but if instead you could have the experience and give birth to that rocket of desire, and at a later time when the momentum isn't filling that grid in, really contemplate what did I put into my grid? What's the core emotional grid? And focus there, and tune yourself to that frequency, then as we were saying to our friend earlier, when you're moving around anything that that former stuff that was so active, can't cross your path and ring its bell in your face again.
So, I should focus on the positive aspects of the person who I'm speaking?
Well that's a little too specific, because boy is it ever hard to focus upon the positive aspects of somebody who's been misbehaving, because and then you just feel like a fool, or a fraud, or like somebody that is taking advantage of you. It's sort of like - who am I kidding?
So, you have to go deeper.
You have to go general.
You have to go general, and you can always find it. So, that's why we're asking you the question, and we'll just take our time here and be easy about it.
So, what are some emotional words that you could use to define what those kinds of experiences cause you to know that you do want?
You know you don't want discord. You know you don't want drama. You know you don't want hours on end of their complaining. You know you don't want to lecture them. You know you don't want to talk, like blowing into the wind. You know you don't want to explain to them brilliant stuff, and have them argue with you about it. You know all of the things that you don't want.
What is it that you do want?
Well you want to be heard. You want to be respected, and that's one of the things that's bothering you the most. You've hooked up with stuff that you know resonates to the very core of your being, and a lot of people won't even give you the time of day, and we get that, it happens to us too. We're spewing the truths of the universe and look at the puny crowd that comes out.
This is leading-edge stuff that we've got going on here, and there's never a crowd on the leading edge, but it's an individual thing. In other words, everyone's not ready to take personal responsibility for their own point of attraction. Most everybody else wants to make you, and you, and you, and you, and you, and you responsible for the way they feel, and so they spend their life futily trying to control conditions, and people, and situations so that they can feel better, instead of doing the grid work.
But the grid work is - establishing a grid, and then the co-operative components have to come to that grid. So, the question that we were asking right before segment of refreshment is - what grid have you got going? And it's easy to understand that, now that we're talking about it, that the grid that you've got going with those people, are you think that their lives could be better, and you think that if they would try just a little bit that they could do something about it, and you think that you have some answers that would be good for them, and you think that, like always, they're not really listening to you, because everybody thinks that their idea is the best one, and you think, well then why do they complain to me if they don't want an answer. Then they shouldn't ask me what I think, so when they present their problems, I'm solution oriented, and so I'm diving right in with all of this truth and knowledge and experience, and then they're not hearing it.
And we say it's because you haven't heard the one thing that is really important, and that is - they've got to be in the vibrational vicinity, or they cannot hear, and so you can't be, ah here it is - you can't be the path of least resistance to their problems, and your grid, at the same time. You got to decide - are you going to lean in the direction of trying to help somebody who's not ready to hear, or are you gonna lean in the direction of all that you know.
And it is our promise to you, that as more and more of you take that option, where you just lovingly leave them where they are, but understand they can't hear you, and there's no point in going there. Lovingly leave them where they are, would understand, sometimes it reaches the place where if you find the alignment of your grid, and they don't come, and you find the alignment of your grid, and they don't come, and you find the alignment of your grid, and they don't come, and you find the alignment of your grid, and they don't come - they just move out of your experience, and sometimes that's hard because sometimes you have longtime friendships, or even family, but if you're not vibrating on the same wavelength, and this is the thing that's so hard about family because it feels like I should be there anyway. It feels like I should be willing to let their grid be dominant, but when you let that grid be dominant and it tears you apart from yours, then you don't feel good. Which is what this conversation is about.
So, now we've really laid it out there - what's the core intention that is coming out of this?
I want to be true to who I am.
I want to connect to the leverage that creates worlds, and I want to be able to uplift them.
I want to get so good at this that I'm just radiating pure positive energy, and that if they get anywhere in the vicinity of it, they will benefit just by thinking my name.
They will benefit just by real, I will teach to the clarity of my example. I will be so tuned in, tapped in, turned on that when they think of me they will think of someone who's having success, because my joy and alignment and clarity and vitality will be evident to anyone who gazes upon me.
That's what you're really reaching for, and there are a whole lot of people not ready for that. That carts going way too fast down the hill, and they're sticking the sticks in the spokes, because they've gone way too fast for them, way too fast for them, way too fast for them, and you're saying - come on it's fun. I've done it a million times. It works out just fine, but everybody has to have their own experience don't they?